Patmos United Methodist Church

                                                      From the Pastor’s Heart
                                                            May 28, 2020

                                           Bethesda-Patmos Cooperative Parish

Rev. Claire B. Miller

Grief. Such a small word, but one that invokes a multitude of thoughts and feelings. There are many things that bring on the emotion of grief. Among them are the death of a loved one, the loss of employment and the knowledge that injustices continue to happen in this world. I suspect we all have felt grief at some time or another in our lives. It begins with some event and may seem innocuous at first. Often the emotions that accompany grief are so subtle that we may
not even realize at first that we are grieving. Until that is, our grief hits us full force in the face. And then, we are often floored by it and sometimes even immobilized for a time.

Many Psychologists tell us that there are five stages to grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.  Other psychologists say that there is a sixth stage to grief called “finding meaning”. Regardless of the number of stages, I think it is safe to say that all of us who have dealt with grief had moved through each of the stages at some point or another in our lives. The thing to realize though is that we don’t actually move “through” these stages as one might
follow a straight line. Rather, we move in and out of the stages at any given time as we grieve. So, at one moment we may be angry with the situation which has brought on our grief (whether it is someone near to us dying or some other tragedy or trauma which has occurred), and the next we may be stopped in our tracks by an overwhelming sense of being depressed. Grief has its own timeline and the journey of grief is different for each of us.

Lately I’ve been grieving quite a bit (as I know many of you are as well). I am grieving the recent loss of family members and friends and my inability (due to social distancing requirements) to come together with family and friends to celebrate those loved one’s lives. I am also grieving the loss of so many people world-wide to this pandemic and for those who are in lock-down and struggling with their isolation. I am especially grieving the loss of being together in worship and in other church activities with my church families because of COVID-19. I miss you! I miss seeing you in worship (preaching to a camera is just not the same as being with you!). That said, I have been reminded throughout all this social distancing that WE are the Church, and Church can (and does) happen anywhere. I have experienced “Church” when I see those of you who tune into our weekly online service. I have experienced “Church” in the phone calls, texts, emails, and cards that we have exchanged while we are apart. I’ve also seen it happening in the grocery
store when shoppers find ways to assist one another, even while keeping socially distant.

I say all this to share with you that even though I may be grieving, I am constantly reminded that God is in control of the ultimate outcome of this time that we are living in. To paraphrase what theologian Frederick Buechner said, “The worst thing is not the last thing.” Each week when I lead an online worship service and when I send out my sermon to those who are not online, I am reminded that although we are physically apart, nothing can keep our hearts from touching one
another. We are still one in spirit and God’s Spirit is still with us, always and wherever we may be.

I know these times are incredibly difficult for all of us. Please remember that you are not alone in your grief. I pray that you will be encouraged by the Apostle Paul’s words in his letter to the Colossian Church, “Let the peace of Christ rule your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. Be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly.” (Colossians 3:15-16) May our Lord Jesus bless you and may God’s Spirit encourage you in your grief.

There is light at the end of the tunnel.

God bless,
Pastor Claire